On the day before Thanksgiving, I spoke to one of my lifelong friends for the last time. This is the first time I am opening up to talk about it. My friend Cecelia and I grew up together and bonded more and more as the years passed. Our daily phone conversations were typically making light of the ups and downs of life and family and that we shared together for 58 years.
Although we had moved forward with the times and text messages chimed throughout the day I am thankful for the “miss you” and “miss you” words that appear on my message feed.
Six months have gone by, and I am stuck in phase one of the grieving process. Still numb and in disbelief. Just today, I thought to call her, then the reality sets in, and my idea is to keep that number in my phone forever.
Maybe I could have been more persistent and insist she sees a Doctor for a recent concern, regardless of the risk during Covid.
Without a Memorial service due to Covid restrictions in her state, it feels unfinished. Emotionally and spiritually unfinished, is the best way to describe this state I am in over this.
The autumn of life seems to be diminishing my family and friend list. It is so often that I am told of another passing. Some hurt more than others, but for each one, I thank God that our paths crossed. Every life touched warmed my spirit.
And if Cecelia could say something right now it would be, ” Oh my gosh, you’re writing about me”.
Have a good day and thanks for stopping by
Alice
I’m so sorry to hear about Cecelia. Covid and the ramifications of it, has changed so many lives and have taken so many lives. I feel for you. 58 years what a blessing you two were to each other. Thanks so much for sharing. Be gentle with yourself. If I were there, I’d just let you talk or not talk and just let you be you and feel the sadness.
So sorry for your loss. I know what it’s like not being able to have a proper memorial for a loved one. I lost my father last October and just yesterday a neighbour asked how my Dad was. I felt badly that he didn’t know but we really only talked if we passed each other on the street. My father talked to everyone. I’m sure this won’t be the last time someone asks about him.